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FOLLOW THESE INSTRUCTIONS
1998 William J. Beaty

ATTENTION ALL GROWNUPS. Your "inner child" has long been waiting for a chance to usurp control of your body and force it to perform certain actions. The time is now at hand. Read and follow the instructions below. Do this now.

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"The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of childhood into maturity."  - T. H. Huxley
Pulsing Bloodbags
Shake your hand really hard, for a fairly long time, until your fingertips feel like they're turning into rubber. Stop for a moment. Now do it again. It takes less time the second time for "rubberization" to commence, eh?
(kaboom)
While yawning, notice that rumbling sound right near the end of the yawn. You can control it consciously, and make a "boom" sound which only you can hear. Walk down the street while accompanying yourself on the Invisible Bass Drum. Launch thought-balls at irritating drivers and hear them explode. Burst out giggling while walking along at work, and nobody knows why!
Garden of delights
Keep a pocketful of dimes and quarters with you at all times, and constantly leave them in knee-level weird places where only a child would ever look. Inside the hollow shafts of toilet-paper holders. Balanced along the ridges of decorative molding. Inside pencil sharpeners at the local elementary school. In the coin slots of gumball-dispensers (give 'em a half-turn.) Imagine the eventual entertainment that will result.
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WEIRD COMMUTER TRICKERY

CROSS ONE EYE

EXPLODE A BOTTLE

[Big ugly closeup of my teeth w/lips stretched] Enhanced Awareness
Look in the mirror, use both hands to pull your lips wide, then snap your teeth open and closed as shown in the photo. This makes you "AWARE OF YOUR SKULL." Why, your face is just a thin layer of meat! Now be honest, can't you feel your Death sitting up there in the future, patiently waiting? You Americans, you talk and you talk, but you don't consider The Salmon Mousse! All too soon that skull in the mirror won't be moving any more. Might there be something important you should be doing right now? (Once the full-blown skull awareness wears off, find another mirror and restore it to full strength.)

Gleeking/Gleeting
Yawn. (no, REALLY yawn), then immediately curl your tongue backwards and force it against the roof of your mouth. The saliva glands under your tongue will squirt like a squirtgun! You can only squirt once or twice before another yawn is required. Also works while eating (or sucking on hard candy.) Practice this in front of a mirror until you can slightly part your lips and silently hit a target with deadly accuracy. Hey! Is it raining in here?
Waskilly Wabbit
Say "aah-eeee-ahh-eee" with a deep voice, but relax your face and shake your head back and forth hard and fast so that your cheeks flap. Sounds like Elmer Fudd when he's trying to shake off the dizzyness that comes from being hit on the head. Try this next time you get flattened by a falling anvil, see if it helps.
A Feynman trick
Before you eat that apple, sniff it well. Smelling can be better than eating. Smell the table. Smell the floor. Smell the computer screen. Why should dogs have all the fun?
 

Greenblatt's Legacy
Rub your palms together hard, so you make those little black rolls of dead skin. Those are called "Blatties." They're named after an early computer hacker at MIT.
Zen Fluid Dynamics
Sit in a sunbeam in a dimly-lit room. Light a stick of incense, hold it vertically, then move it upwards and stop suddenly, with a jerk. A perfect smoke-ring will be launched from the burning tip. Move the incense upwards, then suddenly jerk downwards, then repeat. You can launch fast smoke-rings through the center of slow ones, create side-by side rows, etc. In a draft-free room they persist for ages, and soon the air will be full of huge grey thin circles. Contemplate the silent Chaos.
Where'd I leave it?
Teach yourself to talk understandably while your mouth is wide open. If you ever accidentally cut your lips off or misplace your lower jaw, this will come in quite handy. "Tleese take ne tll a hos-thitle innnediatly!"
Use both hands to stretch your lips wide, then talk to friends with your jaw clamped shut. They will become VERY aware of your skull, and it won't wear off very quickly either. Maybe never.

Gravity warped
Another childhood trick: when riding in the car, and approaching some railroad tracks (or other large hump), hold your arms upwards! The sudden drop in g-forces makes your stomach feel VERY weird, and holding your arms over your head seems to amplify the effect. Like lifting your arms while going downhill on the roller-coaster at the amusement park

Two-inch sparks
Create REALLY BIG "static" sparks: on a winter's day, scuff your feet on the rug so that your body becomes electrified. Now stand near a victim. Wiggle your shoes while pressing on the rug, so that you build up some charged footprints. Now suddenly LEAP INTO THE AIR and touch your victim with your finger at the same time, while you're still in flight. The spark will be much stronger than normal. (It's called "capacitve voltage multiplication." and VandeGraaff generators employ this effect.)

[animation, one eye crossed, then the other.] Cross one eye
This is a very simple trick. Just cross your eyes at somebody so everything becomes doubled, then stare at just one of the pair of people you see. If you look at the left-hand twin, that person will see your right eye cross, but your left eye will not. Crossing one eye is supposed to be a come-on in the South Pacific and Indonesia. In Kabuki theater it's called 'mie.'

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Plasma jellybeans
While waiting in the dark outside a movie theater or pub, violently shake your head back and forth while observing nearby neon signs. (this only works with clear-tube orange signs.) See those frilly filgerees in the bands of light? All neon signs have them, but normally they wiggle back and forth so fast that humans can't see them. Physicists call them "positive column striations," while neon signmakers call them "jellybeans". Tell bystanders what you are doing, and soon you'll have a crowd of people shaking their heads in the dark like fools.

Sticky eyeballs
Learn to cross just one eye (see above.) Walk near a victim, cross one eye, then say "Hey something's wrong!" Shake your head as if to fix the stuck eye. No good. Blink repeatedly. Finally strike yourself on the side of the head repeatedly, then straighten your eyes. Whew! Don'cha hate it when that happens?

Backwards Student
Teach yourself to read upside-down. Comes in handy: you can read the books of people sitting across the table from you. Teach yourself to write backwards in cursive. Da Vinci did this, it was years before people realized that his notebooks weren't written in unbreakable cypher.



"There is another world, but it's inside this one"      -Paul ?uard



Do the Celestial Crawl
On a cloudless warm night, walk around until you can put a nearby building or tree very close to a bright star in the eastern sky. Now lay on the ground and move yourself until the corner of the building or the top of the tree just BARELY covers that star. Wait a moment. The star will reappear. Wiggle along to cover up the star again. It reappears. Keep wiggling along. (Um... notice that the entire Earth is rotating beneath you?)

Burst of flavor
While reading, eat something. Notice that the flavor vanishes as soon as you get involved with the story you're reading? Now concentrate on your mouth, and the flavor explodes into reality. By concentrating on the text or on your mouth, you can make the flavor flash on and off. WEIRD!

Finger of PAIN
After getting out of the car, quickly touch one of your passengers. Snap! Why waste a good "zap" on the car door? (If you don't enjoy sparks, then use the car keys to touch your passenger. The shock still occurs, but YOU won't feel it!)

Visible Touch
Look to the left, close your eyes, then touch the rightmost edge of your right eyeball with a fingertip. (Push gently on your eyelid, don't touch the eye itself!) Wiggle your finger up and down. See anything off to the left? That's the "image" of your fingertip, but the retina of your eye is feeling it, not seeing it. Move your finger UP, and the black/silver splotch moves DOWN. Use two fingertips, and you see two splotches. This is the realm where touching meets seeing.

Some more cool things involving eyelashes, light waves, etc.

Twang Optic Nerve
Here's the other way to "touch your retina." Much funnier. First teach yourself to cross just one eye (see above.) Now jam one finger up your nose, tap your friend on the shoulder, and say "I can touch my optic nerve!" Simultaneously tense your hand and swerve one eye back and forth, as if your finger is pushing upon it from within.
NOTE: don't really insert a finger in your nostril. Instead create the illusion: extend all fingers but fold your pinky finger under, then push your pinky finger knuckle against your nostril. Practice in the mirror to perfect this "skill."

Restaurant Super-candle
...with a foot-high flame. While in a restaurant, tear off a bit of a napkin or other paper, and twiddle it into a little rod the thickness of a pencil lead. Dip both ends into the liquid candle wax so the whole thing is wetted, then wait for it to harden (or chill it in your drink.) Carefully jab this hard wax rod into the top of the candle so it becomes a second wick. Tilt the candle to expose this extra wick to flame. Now REPEAT THE PROCESS! Five wicks create a tall flame like a blow torch which makes a soft roaring noise.

Tube of Boob
Tune your TV to a blank station and adjust it for good "snow". Stare into the snow. Imagine the number "3", and it will appear as a 3-shaped flickering. But then it will start to slowly rotate. Mentally erase the 3, then imagine a horizontal line. It appears, but it won't stay still, it wants to drift and rotate. Make it shrink and vanish. Keep staring, and soon the snow will smoothly ripple, as if you were looking through the distorting water of complicated waves in a swimming pool. Think of more stuff to create mentally. View the "snow" with one eye covered with dark sunglasses. Who says that watching TV for hours isn't worthwhile?!

Music of Infinity
While painting murals in the "graffiti tunnel" under the U. of Rochester quad, I was humming and hit a resonance which got very loud. Over weeks I made it my habit to hum at the fundamental acoustic resonance of the width of the long concrete corridor. The slight humming would slowly grow until I could almost feel the hair on my arms buzzing. It didn't work as well with crowds of people in the tunnel (acoustic damping of sentient protein-blobs), but I doubtlessly weirded-out the lone student late at night.


Carl Jung, upon being asked by James Joyce to explain the difference between Joyce's mind versus that of his schizophrenic daughter, replied:

"She falls. You jump."

Un SELF -ishness
This person (I?) has just remembered an idea from last year. Write a long email or a story, but do not say "I" or "me", instead say "this one" or "the body." After a couple of hours of this, THIS ONE encounters a slightly drunken state, and THE BODY becomes prone to fits of giggling, and certain childish verbal gyrations begin to arise spontaneously in the writing. Beware, for if the body should accidentally send the resulting email message to a similar body at another location, that distant body will aquire the conviction that the originating body has gone entirely whack-o.
Expose numberous extraneous bodies to the same message and they will forever gaze on the initiating body with perhapsvalid suspicions about its sanity. THIS ONE also suggests employting this self-cancellation technique when dressed as an alien for Halloween. A genuine hivemind organisms would refer to the hive members as "this one", and if all selfreferential internal selftalk terminology is altered until a certain temporal threshold is exceeded, the body will not only THINK borg, but will become in danger of BEING borg!

Now go forth and also eliminate the verbs "is, was, were..." Aha! The experts already know about this "self-cancellation" stuff.      Also check this out: On Shyness

Balloon gyroscope.
Put a coin inside a balloon, then blow it up and tie it off. Shake it and then swirl the balloon around, and the penny will start rolling around in a circle! It makes a whirring noise and smoothly circulates. Get it going fast, then let it go, and the balloon whirrs and wobbles maniacally.

Once you get good at spinning the coin, get it going in a vertical circle, and place the balloon gently against one ear. Loud mechanical roaring noise! Do this with TWO balloons at the same time, and put one balloon against each of your ears. It's LOUD, and has stereo effects. Better yet, sneak up behind your victims and put them on THEIR ears. Sounds like UFOs touching down right outside your building.

The noise from the Monolith
Get a "bloogle" (one of those corrugated plastic hose noisemakers.) Spin it around while holding the end over your mouth, then say "eeeeeeeeee" with a deep voice. The sound comes from all directions and inside your head. WEEEEEEIRD. Now go "ooooo" like a police siren, and it sounds like a UFO full of elephants.

Make 'smoke' with your mouth
Compress the air in your mouth, then let off the pressure, then let the air out slowly. You'll see fog!
Detailed version: Face a light source such as a bare light bulb. Tightly close you lips. Fill your cheeks with air partially, breathe normally through your nose, then fiercely tense your cheeks and lips while blowing to compress the air inside. (It helps if you push fingers on your lips to keep air from spurting out.) Now relax your cheeks, part your lips, and spit the air out very slowly. (Don't breathe out, instead spit the air out with cheeks and tongue.) Smoke! Fog comes out of your mouth. It's just like the fog in the neck of a freshly opened bottle of cola. This works great in the dark with a flashlight.

Psych. Experiment
Get some epoxy or crazy-glue and attach a quarter to the floor. Who can resist stopping to grab it? Arrrg! Put it in a spot that you pass by every day and see how long it survives. Eventually somebody will come along with a pocketknife and pry it loose. Once I did this in the entrance of the Psychology department at the U. of Rochester. The quarter lasted for weeks. After awhile a black blossom of markings appeared around it. People were scuffing the floor while trying to kick it loose. Years later at a party somebody mentioned seeing the quarter there, but they were afraid to mess with it because they assumed that some psychology student was watching it with a hidden video camera as part of some experiment.

Make your 'self' vanish
As a child, while all alone, pretend that you are not who you think you are, but that you have suddenly woken up in this human body, and your memories of your whole entire life have just been placed in your head. Your real memories of your "real" life are gone. Your mom and dad are not your real parents, they are the parents of the child you've just been forced to occupy. You know you were just somewhere else a moment ago, but now you are here on this "Earth" thing, and you don't know how to escape and go back to your real home!

When done right, the shivers and black sparklies encroach, and you feel like you are nearing a precipice in the darkness. EEWWWWWW!

The Hot Chocolate Effect
Get a mug, a METAL spoon, and some hot water. Mix in the chocolate powder, then while the spoon is still immersed in the liquid, tap it against the bottom or sides of the mug. It goes "thunk" instead of "clink." Keep tapping, and you'll hear the pitch rise higher and higher. Now stir the liquid. Resume tapping, and hear that the pitch is low again (but then it rises.) If you keep tapping for long enough time, the tone will eventually become a high-pitched "clink" sound. Acoustics researchers give this phenomenon the exotic name... hot chocolate effect! (The underwater foam-cloud is the cause. The speed of sound is slower in foam. Beaten egg-whites or ice cream in root beer create similar effects.)

Swimming pool "hot chocolate effect"
Take two rocks into a swimming pool. Splash around in order to create a huge cloud of underwater bubbles. Quickly knock the rocks together underwater inside the bubble-cloud. You'll hear a loud low musical tone, like a gong. As you hit the rocks together repeatedly, the pitch rises. (No rocks? Sometimes you can whack your knuckles together hard enough to make the "dong" sound. Hurts though.)

Foam blast
Mix a bit of whipped cream with a little water, stir well, then pour in a large amount of warm cola. FOOSH! Giant explosion of foam all over. If you do the same with milk and cola, very little happens. The microscopic bubbles in the whipped cream are the cause. The same thing happens when melted ice cream hits carbonated beverage, thus explaining why "rootbeer floats" make foam, yet pouring milk into rootbeer creates only boredom. Ice cream is actually a "miniaturized foam," and it only needs some carbonated water to let it expand back its true size. Prepare a trap: put a small dab of the dilute whipcream or melted ice cream in a cup, then ask someone to pour in your chosen carbonated beverage. Make a cola-rocket by injecting a turkey-baster-full of diluted whipcream deep into a full bottle of warm carbonated liquid. And finally, if you ever see people eating ice cream, offer them a big gulp from your cup of cola. It will tend to spray out of their nostrils.

Longer Seeing
Modify your perceptions with physics rather than psychopharmacology: put an infrared filter in some welding goggles, then wear them outdoors on a bright, sunny day. (Choose a filter that is in the near-IR, so a bit of light is visible still. Or try theatrical gels, congo blue combined with primary red, several of each.) The world will become EXTREMELY BIZARRE. Wait a couple of minutes until your eyes grow accustomed to the darkness. Then the bright pink clouds drift in the dark sky above the frosty white trees. The world is dusk, yet the sun still shines. Car tail-lights blaze brightly. The houses and roads are dark. But the grass! The trees! They are frosty blazing red, like snow which has been sprayed with cherry Kool-aid powder. Everyone's clothes are altered. Blue-jeans are almost white. Some black clothing turns light grey. The artwork of T-shirts is almost invisible, and everyone's hair is grey. (New: see the article.)

I've heard that some types of clothing are transparent to the infrared, so stagger on down to the beach and verify if this is so. "Mister, why are you wearing those goggles?"

Caught in a Facewarp
Find a piece of mirror material about 30cm across (or just take a small mirror out of its frame.) If your mirror has sharp glass edges, grind them off with emery paper or put scotch tape on the edges. Next, stand in front of a larger mirror so you can see your reflection. Place your smaller mirror against your face so that its edge runs vertically down the middle and is slightly crushing your nose. Tilt your mirror sideways until you see your reflection in the bigger mirror. Your face will look perfectly symmetrical because your small mirror is reflecting the other half: you'll have a face that's composed of two left halves or two right halves.
Look to the side and YOUR EYES MOVE IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS! Gah! Tilt your head one way and your cranium expands hugely, tilt it the other way and you become a pinhead with a gigantic neck. Move the edge of the mirror so your nose has one nostril and you develop a single large eye. Hide one hand behind the non-reflective side of the mirror and extend one finger under the mirror's edge against your face. A worm appears on your face (a worm with fingernails.) Wiggle your finger. Open your mouth and and grasp your finger between your teeth, and the fatnecked-pinhead has bitten the worm! Swallow it (and perhaps use your hidden hand to push your neck flesh sideways, to form a lump that moves down your throat.)
By this point I will have become "overly amused" and in danger of damaging myself.

See your Blood
Get one of those red LED keychain flashlights. Close your eyes, then glance rapidly back and forth while placing the bright red LED against your eyelid. You see sharply-focused "trees"! If it doesn't work, move the LED to different spots while continuing to wiggle your eyes by glancing back and forth. The "trees" are the blood capillaries that cover your whole retina. The spot where they all converge is your blind spot, and in the exact center of your viewpoint is a small dark blotch that has no capillaries. Very strange that your eye is constructed with the blood vessles ON TOP of the retina, where they can cast shadows! Remeber those "retina pattern ID" readers from SF stories, that read your eyes like fingerprints? These blood vessles are what they detect. Now try the same thing with your other eye.

The Vanishing Rod
If you're in a place where cotton candy is available, you can make a large "rod" vanish. Get a small cup of warm water (or use your cup of stale diet cola so you don't draw attention to your preparations.) Then stretch and wad one whole batch of cotton candy into a solid rod-shaped mass. Then take your rod and shove it into your cup. The entire thing vanishes! The water soaks the tight-packed fibers, which dissolve almost instantly, so the wave of "sludge-ification" is very fast.

Vanishing Mass
This one's dangerous, so take your life in your hands. (Better do it outside.) Connect up an aquarium air-stone to your gas kitchen stove, dunk it in a bucket of sudsy water, and let it create a gigantic mass of bubbles. Carefully light the mass with a match. It doesn't flame. It doesn't go bang. Instead it WINKS OUT OF EXISTENCE! Every tiniest bubble vanishes in an instant. This big white "object" is suddenly not there anymore. (After getting overconfident, I held these white bubble-masses in my hand and lit them. No burns, just slightly warm water.) Probably the water in the bubbles boils, which slows down the flame-front. [DANGER! DON'T USE PROPANE! I used city gas in Rochester NY. I tried the same trick using propane. YAAARRG, it creates a huge fireball which will leave soot on your ceiling and perhaps ignite your curtains!]

THE NULL ZONE
Stare straight ahead, then concentrate on things in your peripheral vision. Try wiggling your fingers while moving your hand out "beyond the edge." Is the edge fuzzy? What color is it out there? It's not black. It's too weird, since there's a boundary, but there's NOTHING on the other side of it. It's not really an edge at all, since an edge divides two regions. This "edge" has NO REGION on the other side!

NEPTUNE'S HAMMER
Obtain some V8 juice or orange juice in a small glass bottle. (Any vacuum-packed non-carbonated liquid should work.) Hold it in one hand and strike the top with the heel of your other hand. If you strike it hard, the glass bottom will fly off and the liquid will blast downwards. If you strike it more softly, you'll hear a loud "snap" sound. Practice striking it sofly enough to obtain the interesting noise. Now break the seal and let in the air, and you'll find that you can't create the snapping sound anymore. The sound is caused by cavitation, by a "water hammer" effect. Liquids are held together by atomic bonding, and if you create negative pressure, you can tear open some bubbles made of vacuum. When the bubbles slam shut again, the water pressure becomes momentarily immense. But if the liquid is at atmospheric pressure to begin, you can't create enough negative pressure to get to the cavitation realm. (This works with canned vegetables too, and with glass jars of pasta sauce.)

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Aware of your ENTIRE SKELETON
Taverns with black light tubes are rare now, but if you should find one, make sure to have a couple fluorescent green "highliter" markers in your posession. Under black light the skin on human arms looks purple-brown. Draw a marker line on your knuckle. Blazing yellow-green! Sketch in some crude finger bones and your hand looks like a moving skeleton. Do up both of your hands. Add arm bones, Ulna and Radius. Metacarples even! On a busy night the onlookers may demand that you to set up a phosphorescent tatoo parlor. (This all seems to wash away in the shower, but try viewing it again under black light the following evening. It's still there!)

Never drive with a Jerk
As you slow your car at a traffic light, the deceleration is relatively constant, but when your car actually halts, the deceleration vanishes. Your passengers feel the sudden change as they fall back into their seats. This effect is so common and expected that we can play with everyone's heads: remove the jerk! As you brake to a halt, simultaneously ease off the pedal so your car decelerates less and less. Time it right and you will stop braking entirely just as the car halts entirely. Unless your riders are looking out the window, they won't realize that the car has actually stopped. (This works particularly well with a van full of kids who are waiting to leap out as soon as you come to a complete stop.) [I'm told by a commercial pilot that this is a common practice on airlines. At the end of the flight when passengers are waiting to leap up and rush to the overhead bins, they'd better look out the airplane windows. The passengers who run by inertial guidance (waiting for the final jerk) will be intentionally misled!]

Wearing the Invisible Mask
During primitive festivals (Mardi Gras, halloween) we hide our identities, and if we take the right mental turning, we discard our everday personalities. A stranger takes charge. But why wait for Fat Tuesday? No masks needed! Take a lesson from the little kid in "The Shining" and just start talking funny. Continuously. For hours. Donald Duck Voice works, but I prefer a mutant version of Grover from Sesame Street. Open your eyes wide and stare into the distance (altered states are attracted with the eyes.) Eliminate the word "I," if you really must. Scare loved ones. "THIS ONE IS SORRY, MRS. BEATY, BUT THE WILLIAM FRAGMENT IS NOT CURRENTLY PRESENT. FULL CONTROL OF VOCAL CHORDS IS ATTAINED, BUT OTHER MAJOR MUSCLES ARE NOT ON LINE." (jerk arms spastically for effect.) When they stop smiling and loudly insist that we cut it out, we're approaching the proper "Mask Wearer" state.

Dry your tongue!
Get a clean cloth or paper towel. Stick out your tongue, then dry it thoroughly with the cloth. Keep sticking it out so it will air-dry a bit more. Now challenge your friends to feel your dry tongue surface. Weird and creepy. Grab the hands of an unsuspecting passersby, and force them up against your warm dry tongue.

Halloween costume optics: your head in a jar.

  1. Find a flexible 9" fresnel lens. Often they're sold in bookstores as reading aids.

  2. Smash it onto your face, bend the edges to touch your ears. Tape it there.

  3. The bent lens makes it look as if your face is under water.
Unfortunately you can't see a damn thing while wearing this. It's giving you "Head-in-jar Vision!" Cut some small eyeholes. Now go out and play in traffic
at night.

Suck a paperclip up your nose!
This one's from Jim Burrows Get a medium-small rubberband and a paperclip. Put the rubberband around your palm and the back of your hand. Thread the paperclip onto the band, then hold the paperclip between thumb and forefinger. If you let it go, the paperclip should instantly snap back, vanishing from sight. OK, now hold the paperclip again, draw attention to yourself. When everyone's watching, stick the paperclip partly up your nose, then snort violently while letting it go. The rubberband will make it vanish. [Alternately, put a second paperclip in your mouth beforehand. After you've vanished the first one, "cough up" and spit out the second one. Perhaps put paperclips in mouth, both ears, bellybutton...]

LORD OF THE GNATS
On NPR "Livng on Earth", an entemologist mentioned that swarms of gnats will move towards anything that emits the low humming sound of female gnat wings. Apparently you can "suck" an entire cloud of (male?) gnats towards you by humming with low pitch... and they'll stop drifting the instant you stop the sound. Two people can "pull" the insect cloud back and forth between them. But... does this mean that gnat-clouds are always male? Really? Maybe instead your humming is screwing up the gnat navigation. If the gnat-cloud can remain on station while ignoring small breezes, they're doing something exotic, and perhaps the incoming sound waves at nearly their wing-beat frequency causes them to misjudge their horizontal speed, so the whole cloud moves towards the sound source. I wonder what various frequencies will do to the cloud. Maybe you could play a very special tune to them, and cause the gnat-cloud to sculpt itself into shapes. Letters. Ads for Pepsi, etc.

LORD OF THE ANTS
A stream of ants invaded my workbench. I found I could get rid of them; "reflect" them all back to their nest by placing several pieces of wet cookie along their trail where it came out of the wall. They all end up grabbing some food and returning to the hole, so the long trail dries up. Earlier I tried erasing a segment with alcohol scrub, but they found a new path within minutes. But wait a sec. If I place lots of food at the *far* end of their long trail, then their trail becomes "ant suction," since any wandering ants will soon cross it and get harnessed as food transport. It hoovers up every ant in the whole downstairs. Hours later I can dry up that whole trail by putting food near its beginning (placed on a piece of paper.) When the trail is gone, I throw the few ants+paper outdoors, then put a blob of caulk over the crack in the wall. Ants gone, but NONE KILLED.

TWO-LAYER COLA
Diet drinks will float on full-sugar drinks, but only if you add a layer of crushed ice to disrupt the flow from the spigot. Do this: first add about an inch ice, then fill it half way with normal NON-diet cola, then top it off with a different color of diet drink (such as Lite lemonade, or diet orange, or lemon-lime, etc.) It's like a "Black & Tan" beer! Then you can either drink the first layer and leave the second one, or dip your straw to different levels to drink one layer at a time (and people will see the two colors of beverage going up your clear straw. Strange!) If you use a clear plastic cup, then you can also make subsurface waves that slosh back and forth in slow motion like those blue "ocean wave" paperweight thingies.

PENNY CYCLOTRON ACCELERATOR
I had a big potato-chip bowl. I had a penny. After some practice I could fling the penny along the inside surface so it would run around about seven times before hitting bottom. (If this is too difficult, then first practice with a marble or ball-bearing) Then I realized, OF COURSE! AH HAAAAAAA, YES!      WE CAN CREATE *INFINITE COIN VELOCITY* by swirling the bowl along the table as the penny rolls. Pump the penny each time it passes. Yep, it works, and the sound-effects are notable, but the penny climbs to the top edge of the bowl then flys outwards in a random direction. Observe, Eegore, for if we wish to attain a coin velocity which approaches the Relativistic, we cannot use a snack bowl which is at all cone-shaped.

Dare to be Different
Besides daring to sing loudly where others can hear, have you ever dared to "think out loud" in public? Perhaps even start a long conversation with yourself? Now finally it's possible without embarrassment: just get an old defunct cellphone and an earphone/mike. Sit in the park with the cellphone in your lap and say anything you want, right out loud. Nobody will care. (Just don't dare to try this WITHOUT an obvious cellphone and microphone-headset!) Hmmm. Even better. Just wear a mike-headset alone, but with the plug dangling loose in your lap. Passersby will assume that you have a cellphone. But perhaps one or two people will look more closely, realize that no cellphone is involved, then suddenly stop smiling. And back away from you carefully.

SEATTLE GUERRILLA ART MEME
Kids tie their old sneakers together and then pitch them over a phone line. Harness their raw power, little one! Print out a sign you've designed, seal it with clear spray paint, glue it onto cardboard, and then find a rock or a large iron bolt and a length of twine. Tie the rock to the sign, and hurl them over a phone line above a street. How many years will it remain there, twirling in the breeze? (Um... be sure to make the sign large enough to read from a distance! Testing is required...) Print two different words, one on each side, so it flashes them alternately while it spins.

POP YOUR EYEBALL WITH A FORK
At a restaurant with friends, give everyone the jitters by playing with a fork very close to your eyeball. Use the tines to pull your eyelid down, etc. Everyone is creeped out. Now take one of those tiny plastic cups of ultrapasturized creamer, cup it in your hand and hold it up to your eye without anyone noticing, use the fork to poke holes in the paper lid (looks like you're stabbing your eye,) then squeeze the cup and scream while dropping the fork! White gunk will squirt all over the table. This one comes from Penn & Teller's PLAY WITH YOUR FOOD, a book that readers of this website just GOTTA have! Twisted insightful tricks by vengeful nerd social outcasts.

BIG GIANT HEAD
Get two identical cola cans or yogurt cups or bottles of white-out. Place them in front of you on the desk, a couple of inches apart horizontally, then rotate them so they look identical. Then cross your eyes so you see three of them. Concentrate on the middle one, and tilt your head a bit so it isn't doubled (maybe rotate one object until the middle one looks perfect.) The middle object looks perfectly 3D... but it's tiny! Actually, the angles of your eyes make them act farther apart than usual, as if your head was huge. OK, now carefully grasp the two objects and very slowly draw them apart while concentrating on the middle one. It will get smaller and smaller while staying exactly the same size. (Or your head will grow larger and larger.)

LOBSTER BOY!
Cross your fingers, and curl your middle finger around your index finger. Now grab your ring finger and curl it over the back of your curled middle finger. Do the same with your pinky. Your hand looks damaged. LOBSTER BOY!! Now do the same with the other hand too. LOBSTER BOY IS HERE TO TAKE AWAY THE BAD CHILDREN.

GIANT CLOWN LIPS
In front of a mirror, stick out your lower lip. Curl it way down using fingers. Now stick out your tongue at the same time and use it to push your lower lip down. Presto, GIANT CLOWN LIPS! Now make lobster-boy hands and cross one eye as well. Too bad the giant clown lips make gleeking impossible.

MISPLACE YOUR HEAD
Stolen from Michael Jackson "Thriller" video. Stand facing away from friends. Bend your head down, chin resting on chest, and hunch your shoulders up a bit. Your friends will see your head TOTALLY DISAPPEAR. Stagger around while feeling the empty spot with hands. Make noises like a wet esophagus.

MONSTER STATIC DISCHARGES
Another good one: buy some "snap-n-pops"; the little paper-wrapped sand balls that go "bang" when stepped on. Find a colleague who is working on live electronic equipment. Hold up a snapper and twiddle it in your fingers HARD. The little explosion sounds EXACTLY like an accidental short to 120V, or maybe like a capacitor discharge.
Now scuff on the rug, then twiddle a snapper while touching somebody on the elbow. The "bang" sounds like the worlds most painful electric spark. (Obviously this is for the benefit of onlookers, since your victim felt nothing.)

COLA CAN BEATBOX
Crush two sides of a coke can inwards, but only near the top, then rotate it 90deg and crush two sides inwards near the bottom. Now push the top and bottom together (or stomp on it) and it very easily collapses into a small round puck. Now pull it partway apart again and you'll hear all sorts of snaps and poings. Push it in and out and the sequence of poings will play forwards and back like a recording. It's a mechanical beatbox sequencer, a toy marimba, a percussion accordian. Make mouthsounds to accompany the noises (such as whistling while humming, or sucking lips to make swarms of mosquitoes.)

Living with an echo
Try speaking a simple sentence, but repeat each word twice. "Testing-testing one-one two-two three-three." It sounds a bit like a genuine echo. OK, now speak each individual syllable twice: "Tes-Tes Ting-Ting One-One Two-Two Three-Three." Say it a few times fast. That sounds very much like an echo. Finally, say it with the accent on the first of each syllables, with no pause between pairs but a slight pause between the different syllables. Speak with constant tone, not like conversation but like making a PA announcement at a ball game. Keep the timing between syllable-pairs always exaclty the same. "TES(tes,) TING(ting,) ONE(one,) TWO(two,) THREE(three). It echos! Sounds disturbingly real!

SOUNDSsounds

DISdis

TURBturb

INGing

LYly

REALreal

Now practice until you can do it fast. Go find unattended microphones, and screw with the sound engineer's head. How to get rid of that echo? Try different hookups. Is it still there? YEP-yep. DAMN! UH-uh. TIC-tic. TUH-tuh. TES-tes.

Head without a body
Walk smoothly. Walk REALLY smoothly. Try to walk so your body and head do not move up and down at all. Especially keep your head from bouncing slightly as you walk. Try to drift along like the princess descending the stairs; like the vampire's wives approaching the sleeping victim's bed. You'll start to feel like a floating TV camera, a disembodied viewpoint. Not really there. Or move fast along the hall, and you become a jet plane flying down the shafts of the gigantic Alien Construction. Put your face next to the side of the hall and race along, and the wall becomes the floor, racing below you at supersonic speed. Soar upwards to avoid the thermostat and the drinking fountain, and don't fall into the chasm or you'll end up in somebody's math class.

Nipple Cola
I accidentally pulled the ring off a can of soft drink. Yet there was a tiny hole in the center. I started drinking. I could shake and invert the can, producing an intense squirtgun effect. Like drinking from a cow?! It's hard to make a small enough hole with the pull-tab, so instead use a needle, or use the awl on your swiss army knife. If the hole is tiny, the can will squirt like a squirtgun for a good long time after each shake. If the hole is too large, it drains quickly. In that case just turn it sideways and suck powerfully on the tiny hole, draining the can and causing it to collapse. When colleagues ask you what the hell you think you're doing, be sure and tell them what the technique is called.

The journey starts with a step
Smoothly and rapidly walk down stairs while skipping alternate steps. (It requires some practice alone, but it's not that hard.) I started doing this in grade school where the "hall monitors" would call the teacher if they caught any kids skipping steps while going upstairs. So I started skipping steps going down. This confused them, and they had no rule to cover it.

Triggered Creepout
Are human bodies born with programmed instincts to avoid damage? Try this on yourself: take a sharp pointed object and make sudden stabbing motions toward your forearm. Not very creepy? Now stab towards your throat, or towards your fingertips (under nails.) Ewwww, a definite 'avoidance response.' Now, knowing what to look for, stab towards various body parts. (Or trigger your 'mirror neurons' by watching others perform stabbing on themselves.) Hmmm, my body objects to wrist or knee damage, but doesn't mind stabs to thighs, biceps, etc. I guess that makes sense: body somehow knows to use its arms to keep sharp broken branches away from its throat. It wants to avoid gut wounds, and is very protective about ear holes and eyes. OK, now get a big dirty rock and jerk it suddenly towards your groin, or towards your brittle delicate teeth!

Neutralization
At a large company party there are helium balloons as decorations. There are also vegetable horsdoeuvres. Tie a carrot or celery stick to a balloon. It must sink rapidly. Eat down the carrot slowly, while testing the buoyancy. When the balloon hovers or sink/rises very very slowly, you're done. Repeat with more balloons. Soon the room is filled with annoying density-neutral objects drifting around. They lose some helium and sink after many minutes, so bite each carrot to restore full nuisance value.

Another Feynman trick
Hold out your arms and point your index fingers at each other with fingertips touching. Now move your arms in a circle with fingertips together. Easy. Do the same but with fingertips at opposite points of the circle, as if you're rolling an invisible cylinder. Easier! OK, now keep circling one arm, but suddenly stop the other one. Harder, eh? And it makes you feel like a machine. Now start circling both again, then suddenly stop the other one this time. Now for the hard part. Keep one arm circling, but CIRCLE THE OTHER ONE BACKWARDS. Your fingertips should pass each other twice per revolution. Hard? No, that's trivial. Trivial! The REALLY hard trick is to circle both arms in the same direction, but circle one of them SLIGHTLY FASTER than the other. Say for every seven turns of one arm, your other arm should turn around eight times so the phasing fingertips approach and pass each other every eight turns. Soon you'll be ready to play bongos ...at two different speeds with your two different hands. Feynman bongo master

Unibrow
In third grade I remember this kid on the playground who could only close both eyes. She hadn't yet learned to close just one. That's no big flaw, since most of us never learned how to raise and lower just one eyebrow. The Unibrow is a state of mind, not something on your face. Much sporadic practice in front of convenient mirrors can cure our sad ignornant state.

PROPER CLAPPING
Clap normally. Smap smap smap. Keep clapping, and now rotate your hands so one faces up, one down, and turn one hand so they collide at 90deg. Cup them both, and try to seal them together as they strike. Now it goes PONK! PONK! PONK! instead of smapping. Sounds like small paper bags popping.

Reddit: chirp like a cricket
Can you purr like a cat, deep in your throat? Or snore, or do a pigeon coo, like "KKKKooo," the loogie-hocking sound. Just whistle at the same time. Apparently very useful when nobody laughs at a joke.

Doing a BONNG.
Get an unopened plastic bottle of cola. Hold it by its cap so it dangles down, then whip it hard in the side with your knuckles: sweep your arm violently past and give it a glancing blow. It goes DOOOOOONG!!! The gas pressure determines the pitch! Thwack it many times to memorize the sound. Then partially unscrew the cap to give a very brief hiss of escaping CO2, then tighten again. Thwack it, and the pitch will be lower. Vent it, whack, vent it, whack, and the note goes down and down. But now try whacking it much harder to splash the contents. It fizzes, and the note climbs upwards with each hard strike. Now go test bottles in the supermarket: all give the same pitch, right? Shake one up, let the bubbles settle, then thwack. PITCH DOESN'T CHANGE? Shaking a sealed bottle of cola does not alter the pressure. Huh. Pee-Wee Herman sez: Counterintuitive-y!

Twinkle twinkle LITTLE EYE
When out at night watching the twinkling stars (which Astronomers call "Bad Seeing,") you can do a simple physics trick. Look at flickering stars down towards the horizon. Cross your eyes and carefully observe the double-image stars. You'll notice that their twinkle pattern is out of sync! Each doubled star image is TWINKLING SEPARATELY. It's no illusion, and it occurs because starlight is spatially coherent. Starlight far more coherent than the best laser, and because of this, starlight has severe laser-speckle. If you could see the starlight shining on a white surface, you'd see multicolor laser-speckle confetti-patterns which are sliding along at the speed of the wind. Turbulent warm/cool air behaves like warped lenses (just like image distortions over a fire.) It distorts the starlight wavefronts to produce strong interference patterns. Usually these patterns are smaller than the distance between your eyes, hence each of your eyes sees a separate "twinkle pattern."

Hearing THE VOICES
Run a fan in your room, or in the next room over. Or turn on a radio or TV, crank the sound up, and tune to a blank channel that provides rushing white noise. Now go about your business. Soon you'll hear whispering voices in the fan. They sound like English (or like your own language.) But you can't quite hear what they're trying to tell you. You're very lucky. Don't listen any closer. You might understand.

Songs from the Other When
Go listen to this bit from a famous movie. It's well-known music, but from an adjacent timestream. For some reason it makes all my arm-hair stand on end. That other life I could have had? It's just outside, peeking in through the blinds. (In our own reality, the makers of Blade Runner instead chose "Memories of Green." The above music was never used.)

Accidentally forget to gravity
Stand out in the middle of the yard, and stare up into the blue sky. Keep staring up, and carefully get to your knees and lie down. Realize that if you make a mistake, you might fall upwards instead of falling down. It might be wise to clench the grass in fists, just to be sure. Be very careful.

The Ultimate Challenge
Say you've learned to cross your eyes. And maybe you've learned the above simple trick for crossing just one eye. And maybe you can quiver your eyes at high speed or change your pupil diameter. That's nothing. NOTHING! Your eye muscles are perfectly capable of moving your eyes to a huge variety of positions, and there is no physical connection between your two eyes. So go to a mirror and learn to move one eye up... and the other eye down! Or cross your eyes, then bring them out to converge on the distant horizon, then keep going and really uncross your eyes. Read a book with one eye while surfing the web with the other. (Is any of this even possible? It might require brain damage. Perhaps trod the path of free-eye viewing of stereopticon cards... then slowly move the two stereo photos to some very un-Viewmasterly positions..)

 


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The Big Book of Pranks. $19.99.
A great book. Interviews with world famous troublemakers.
A wakeup call for anyone who's not entirely dead. Inspiring!



SUGGESTIONS ADDED BY OTHERS ( Add your own.)

Water may move on its own anyway. Pressure from pipes, slight vibration or wind ripple. And that is that...BUT aside from the already known common reasons water moves on its own, I will tell you how to move water without touching it. 100% control. The best largest bowl in the house is usually a toilet. Its already containing water. So make sure wind or any other elements are under control so that you will know it is YOU moving the water. If you have a weak plywood floor where your toilet sits, make sure NOT to cheat that way. Do not breath on the water. OK..so, stand in front of your toilet, think about what you are going to do with respectable genuine confidence. Right hand strongest for gentle manipulation, Left hand aids the right usually. So, allow your left hand to calmly "hold" with palm open the area that is about four feet from rim of bowl. Its imaginary but hold on like you would in a dance with a partner. So you are now staNDING over the toilet, left arm is calmly extended to hold and hover approx four feet from rim, THEN with the Right hand join your left hand in union to understand your next move. Right hand is now using index finger and thumb to gently tickle/ scratch the surface of the water. SO in other words, THINK about the surface of the water and very gently tickle while watching the water. You should notice the water swaying, or shifting water levels/angles. Im learning dozens of ways to stop, start, rock, sway, ripple, push the water. Another easy way to manipulate the water reaction is to use right arm in same way as explained above. Then use right hand, extend all fingers and wave above your head in a circular motion to the exact area of the bowls circular opening (as if you are catching the openness of the escaping water) after about three or four waves in a circular motion ABRUPTLY grip the air and stop and pull away as if you are discarding the grip. In other words your calm three or four waves suddenly stop/grab waters hair/discard behind you. Silly elaboration, I know. You should see the water react, a swaying side to side. With right hand, point, handshake style pet the air but really water in your mind. many different combinations --ALL REAL. For me, for some reason, every time this works.... except after a good rain or storm. I noticed the water will not move until after a few hours.

Also, using the Logitech C615 cam. I am able to capture UFO phenomena EVERY TIME, ANY TIME of day, guaranteed within a minute to five minutes, tops. There is other phenomena in our atmosphere as well..very strange. I do not know why BUT I do know my buddy bought me that C615 Logitech cam for my laptop. I end up putting it on a 10 foot apparatus extending from my upstairs window rigged with strings for pan/tilt and with a pole that spins 360. hehe. Honestly, this is SUPER unheard of. I know NOBODY else who claims this, found out how by accident.

Stephen Centeno <stevecenteno@hotmail.com>
San Antonio, TX USA - Sunday, July 07, 2013 at 05:34:53 (PDT)
Close your eyes and put something over them to block out all the light then apply pressure to your eyes i.e by pressing down with your finger tips. You see all these strange shapes and colours.... It's very hypnotic.
Jacinta <Blacky@hotmail.com>
Melbourne, Vic Australia - Saturday, July 14, 2012 at 08:13:01 (PDT)
"Shadow Hand"

Quickly, wave your hands around in front of your face.

Ever notice the "blur" when you move your hand? If you do it slowly, and pay alot of attention, you can see a much more pale "shadow hand" moving along at the same speed! It always moves as fast as your hand does, but slightly later. It's easiest to see against a bright or dark wall (whatever contrasts best with your skin).

Flashcreep
USA - Friday, February 17, 2012 at 14:32:05 (PST)
Your own LIGHTSABRE without batteries!

Take a fluorescent light tube.
Locate the nearest overhead power-lines/pylon
Wait for a really damp dark night
Stand beneath the power-line/pylon
Watch that baby light up
Honest, this works and looks good at night

Sir Wankalot
Sutton Coldfield, UK - Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 13:40:57 (PST)
Get a wire coat hanger, a large coin(quarter), some twine or yarn and 3 foam cups. Fill each of the 3 cups with about 4 ounces of whiskey. Have a friend spin the quarter on the table and drink the 3 cups of whiskey before the quarter stops spinning. Then have him jump in his car and speed across town. If you did this right,(may take some practice), your friend will end up butt f* a #ked in the county jail...hilarious!!
squiggophrenia
USA - Tuesday, November 08, 2011 at 08:20:30 (PST)
lick your nose and then it will turn greeen.
logan johnson <joecrabshack77 a yahoocom>
yuba city, California USA - Friday, November 04, 2011 at 08:50:28 (PDT)
In a very quiet room, full of people, hum a very quiet note. See how many people look around for the source of the humming.
Liz
USA - Monday, October 24, 2011 at 22:49:33 (PDT)
When in class, or when you're just bored, while keeping your eyes open, press your fingertips into the outer corners of your eyes. If you keep pressing you get a double image. After a few seconds, eerything is tainted a dark red, then fades to black, and, with your eyes wide open, you can't see anything at all.
Creepy.

Liz
USA - Monday, October 24, 2011 at 22:39:09 (PDT)
Pretend that the floor is one big cliff that you must scale to reach to top.

Lie down on the floor so that your feet are planted on a wall. This makes it look like you're leaning against a cliff, with a bunch of furniture protruding from it. Using whatever furniture or doorframes you need, scale the cliff.

Move around the entire building like this all day. It's awesome.

Liz
New - Monday, October 24, 2011 at 22:32:52 (PDT)
Yeah...well...when /u run out of gas(biologically, not autoogically[yep i said that])and you feel like your falling apart...Drink some Vinegar!!
Brown or red APPLE CIDER VINEGAR!!!
It cures most everything from diabetes, high-blood pressure, high cholesterol, moderates the sugar/glucose in your system for you, and last but certainly not least, it helps your digestive system flow 100x better than YOUR used to.
So, Do that!!And stop playin' wit ya health.
P.S.: Remember: An apple a day keeps the doctor away..

PBanga74 <gstatusent7.19.74 a gmailcom>
Cleveland, OH USA - Saturday, September 10, 2011 at 15:35:55 (PDT)
Feel the "Holes" in the Wind:

While walking into a stong wind, sometimes, if you feel around with your hands, there seems to be "holes" in the wind.
Kinda weird, and dosen't always work.

Zac <zacsim98 a yahoocom>
Muskegon, Mi USA - Friday, August 05, 2011 at 18:22:47 (PDT)
Put a cup full to the top (maybe a little less) with water .
Lay down
Sit on your hands
Get a friend to Put the cup on your forehead and nose ( balance on both )
{ how long did you stay for } !! oh and don't move!!!!!

Harvey <Harvey.k a live co uk>
UK - Saturday, July 02, 2011 at 23:53:51 (PDT)
Some tricks you can use on peoples minds.
When you talk to someone subtly (this is important!! Do not make it obvious or it WILL backfire) try mimicking his/her breathing pattern, his/her behaviour, manner of talking etc. Basically try to be like the person you're talking to. Gradually, talking to them will become easier and they will like you more than before.
If you're good at this, you can take it a step further.
Whenever the person you talk to smiles subtly move any part of your body the person can see (for example scratch your nose, slighty tilt your head or twitch with your eyebrow). After some time (can take weeks) the person will almost always smile when you move that part of your body.
That way you can trigger certain actions in other people, like scratch your nose and the person will smile or tilt your head and the person will look in that direction.
By doing this regularly you bind the mental state of the person to your movement, involuntarily returning to that mental state every time you move.
If you want to take this another step further, try touching the other person, so you can make someone smile, when you for example touch their shoulder (Only do this, when you're confident you can do it subtly).

Karan
Cologne, NRW Germany - Saturday, March 19, 2011 at 17:08:44 (PDT)
Okay, This requires some practice, but it doesn't take long. It may sounds boring, but PLEASE read on, it is very cool. And PLEASE IT IS VERY IMPORTANT YOU READ THE WARNING!
Okay...
Rub your hands together, until they gather some heat. Very slowly, move them apart, about half inch.
Imagine a White Light of energy coming from Earth's core.
It is going between your hands. A White ball starts to form. It is a ball of energy. (It really is. It's Energy.)
You can Put it down somewhere and come back to it if you like. To make it dissapear, leave it on the ground. It will dissolve into the earth.
If you master this, you can change it's colour, and shape it, Make it bigger. If you get REALLY good, you can give it intructions! The name for this ball of energy (Believe me, it IS energy.) is a PSI Ball (Per Square Inch Ball). PLEASE READ THE WARNING!!!!

Read On, I will tell you what other things you can do with this!
You can make a PSI Shield. Do the same thing, so you create a PSI Ball. Now, Make it about the same size as a football. This is done by moving your hands in and out, Back and forth. Then, stretch it out, enough so you can step into it. This is very useful, as it keep away all negative energy, as long as you feed it extra bits of energy throughout the day.
WORD OF ADVICE: Only some people can SEE the Energy. About 37% of the world.
WARNING: It is VERY important that you DO NOT use your own energy, People who do this are known to become cranky, and hard to get along with. ALSO, DO NOT put it down, and leave it kicking around, It can cause HIGH levels of stress!

THIS IS NOT A JOKE! THIS IS REAL!
If anyone is interested in more, i'll tell you how to make a Pen roll back and forth on a flat surface, With the POWER OF YOUR MIND. This is called TELEKINISIS.

NOTE: SORRY FOR THE EXTREMELY LONG POST!
BUT IT'S INTERESTING!

Gabriella <courtneygarrett a hotmail co uk>
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2011 at 07:46:19 (PST)
Try this if you have a model ship with rigging, and a small light bulb or bright LED with long wires attached. Sit in a dark room with bare walls and put the light source onto the deck of the ship. It will cast shadows on the walls that will look to you as the rigging would look if you were standing on the deck. If you ever imagined what it would be like to sail on that ship, this will help you to visualize it.
Tom Del Rosso <tomd003 a verizon.net>
USA - Monday, January 31, 2011 at 19:05:41 (PST)
3D viewing on LP sleeves or book or CD covers.

When you are at a garage sale or shops where you are looking for items with flat picture covers let's say LP's and as they are all in a box you have to look each one from the top of the box so you see every face one by one, and as you are looking the front pictures from the top of them and not in front of them, your brain doesn't understand very well the depth of what you see and after looking let's say around 15 of them, you really feel like seeing them in 3D with depth and everything, the album name come out of the cover, and the faces also seems 3D with the songs names closed of you than the else of the picture. It feel really strange because it's actually your brain that make the depth but you can't control it. A friend of me have never seen this effect so may-be it doesn't work on everybody but on me it works really great and I'm not doing effort for this, it comes naturally.

If you also feel this sometimes please contact me so I know I'm not the only one in the world to see this.

Simon MARTINO <toutpub2(AT)gmailDOTTTco-m>
Liege, BELGIUM - Tuesday, January 18, 2011 at 09:43:40 (PST)
Ok this one is painful, make a thumbs up (squeeze your hand tight) with one hand and bring it straight up while your thumb is still pointing up word...now you are in a lot of pain.
G6 <Brycebball a hotmailcom>
Penis, BJ USA - Thursday, January 13, 2011 at 19:40:45 (PST)
Next time you're in a dark room (lying in bed for example), look at a dark corner and relax your focus, taking care not to move your eyes too much. The darkness will swell and grow, sometimes to the point that your entire field of vision goes black! Pretty neat.
not-i
Canada - Thursday, December 30, 2010 at 01:42:16 (PST)
The other day i was in class at school (doy) right well anyway we were supposed to be showing gestures and stuff like we do everyday and me trying to be funny wanted to be angry so i held my breath and strained (we were standing up) and everything was turning into patterns and stuff next thing i know i was standing up and things were becoming clearer so i thought 'dont fall over' since i really couldnt control my legs or anything and i was leaning on this chair.

so if you want to pass out for a few seconds stand up and hold your breath

Scamp3rs
moo, wafels moowafelz - Thursday, December 02, 2010 at 04:08:03 (PST)
Well I was just thinking about theories on how the moon was formed and wondering if it was possible that the moon used to be a meteroid.
sara
USA - Wednesday, December 01, 2010 at 14:17:09 (PST)
On a humid night, fog up your glasses or some kind of piece of glass and look at bright lights through it. All sorts of colors appear around them. White lights make coloured rings, but monochromatic lights like orange sodium lamps make orange circles.
Nicholas Beck <nbbeck a 90gmailcom>
Jacksonville, Fl. USA - Monday, November 29, 2010 at 05:34:26 (PST)
At night or in a dark room, cover one eye and turn a light on and stare directly at the light with the uncovered eye, then turn of the light and uncover the covered eye, you will be one eye blind and one eye aware then turn on he light and see how the aware eye hurts. its like being semi blind and its wierdly fun.
Rafael Matovelle <srparca a gmailcom>
Quito, Pichincha Ecuador - Friday, November 05, 2010 at 14:00:31 (PDT)
First, stand at a wall so that the tips of your fingers on one arm are touching it (not pressing against it. Just touching it!)

Now fold one arm and rub your elbow three times in a clockwise manner.

Stretch out your arm again...

You will notice your fingers are no longer touching the wall!

(Try rubbing your elbow anti-clockwise and see what happens!)

Rebecca Gichuki <Rebeckyyg a yahloo.com>
Nairobi, Kenya - Monday, October 11, 2010 at 11:16:25 (PDT)
extend both your arms out in front of your body, so that the tips of your fingers are just touching a wall. now, without moving anything else, bend your arms in so that your hands are by your ears, and then extend your arms back to the wall. you will no longer be able to touch the wall.
Theo
USA - Saturday, August 21, 2010 at 15:28:07 (PDT)
Close your mouth. Now put the tip of your tongue against your teeth and start rotating your tongue. It will feel like your teeth are rotating into a vertical position.

When I was little, I used to always check to make sure my teeth were still in place.

Another one, place a straw into a glass of water and drink out of it. Now, take another straw and place it outside of the glass and attempt to drink out of both straws. You won't be able to drink out of either one. (Unless you suck really hard)

Alisoun
USA - Monday, August 02, 2010 at 21:16:59 (PDT)
when i first read this it took me a minute to figure out why people couldnt read it. then i got to the part about the letters being different and looked back and realized that the whole time they were jumbled but its still really cool.

I cnduo't bvleiee taht I culod aulaclty uesdtannrd waht I was rdnaieg. Unisg the icndeblire pweor of the hmuan mnid, aocdcrnig to rseecrah at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mttaer in waht oderr the lterets in a wrod are, the olny irpoamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rhgit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whoutit a pboerlm. Tihs is bucseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey ltteer by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Aaznmig, huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghhuot slelinpg was ipmorantt! See if yuor fdreins can raed tihs too.

andy tino <onlyofyou80 a aim.com>
USA - Thursday, July 22, 2010 at 19:56:58 (PDT)
When driving beside telephone lines and power lines, allow your eyes to go into a soft focus state, where everything seems to be out of focus. Now imagine a c-train or subway car that takes shape of the power/telephone lines. After a while you will see a subway made up of the lines twisting and turning. I use to do this all the time as a kid
Dylan
Canada - Tuesday, July 20, 2010 at 18:47:17 (PDT)
How to get shitfaced by standing on your own!


This is a little something i learned back in my circus but it takes a little time aye? So chill.

Good. Now stand up and stand still. Make sure your eyes are shut.
Now!! Though you are standing still, you realize little tiny muscle spasms and shit in your body working you keep you upright, now slowly, SLOWLY, over like 10 minutes accentuate these little movements

At first you may be standing relatively still, rock here, wobble there, however after long enough you find yourself in a state of complete relaxation, whilst your arms are flailing wildly, body rockin' to match and if you keep getting into it you can even start to take steps or alternatively get on the ground. Keep your eyes closed.

if you wanna chat you could probs facebook that shit

Michael Woodland
Melbourne, Vic Australia - Wednesday, July 07, 2010 at 07:36:46 (PDT)
This is like all the other ones that make you pass out, watch a 30 min. TV show on a bed, then stand up, holding your breath. 15 seconds later you'll wake up.
Connor
USA - Monday, June 28, 2010 at 10:24:47 (PDT)
look at your fingernails. right now, look.
...

if you are male you likely looked at them by facing your palm and bending your fingers.
if you are female you likely looked directly at them with fingers pointing outwards.

try asking others too.

chris
new france - Monday, June 07, 2010 at 00:43:28 (PDT)
I don't know if this one was posted already, but something fun to do if you're stuck in an art museum is find a spot of blank white wall in room where there is a fair amount of people and stare intently at it. Soon enough, a few of them will come and stare along at the "artwork" that you're looking at! My friends and I did this and we were able to get an old lady fixated upon drywall for 5 straight minutes.
Shil
USA - Friday, May 07, 2010 at 17:45:09 (PDT)
Here's one;
on your RIGHT hand, Bend in your middle finger.
Then lift up your Thumb, Index finger and Pinkie. Try to lift up your Ring finger. you can only JUST lift it up.

Random Person. <courtneygarrett a hotmail co uk>
USA - Wednesday, April 28, 2010 at 09:29:09 (PDT)
I've got two for you:

1) Put your hands in your pockets so your palms are against your thighs. Press very hard on the outside part of your pocket that the back of your hand is facing for about 30-40 seconds. When you remove your hands from your pockets, your arms will float.

2) Hold out your arms as far as you can without stretching, so the inside of your arms are facing up. Next, bend and straighten one of your arms 30 times. Straighten it one last time and it will be longer than the other one temporarily. This is because those muscles in the arm are stretched out and more loose than the ones in the other arms. Cool, huh>

Sean
PA USA - Saturday, April 24, 2010 at 19:37:50 (PDT)
Cross your thumb and index finger, then place your thumb onto your top teeth, and index finger onto your bottom teeth. Now run your finger and thumb along your teeth and it will feel like there's a sort of line of teeth hovering inside your mouth, if that makes sense? It works well if you get your fingers right to the back teeth. This also works with other objects with gaps between them too, because your fingers are so used to feeling things in a certain position, when you cross your fingers over, they get confused!
Richard
England - Friday, April 09, 2010 at 03:39:59 (PDT)
Cross your thumb and index finger, then place your thumb onto your top teeth, and index finger onto your bottom teeth. Now run your finger and thumb along your teeth and it will feel like there's a sort of line of teeth hovering inside your mouth, if that makes sense? It works well if you get your fingers right to the back teeth. This also works with other objects with gaps between them too, because your fingers are so used to feeling things in a certain position, when you cross your fingers over, they get confused!
Richard
UK - Friday, April 09, 2010 at 03:39:45 (PDT)
First, croutch down preferably next to a bed and take 20 deep breaths (in and out is 1 time!) then immediatly stand up and hold your breath your vision will fade and you will feel like sitting down, when you feel like this you dont have much time of consiousness left! sit down on the bed quick and you will black out for a few seconds and come back lieing down because you fell over when you were out probly but if you are tired you will fall asleep most likly. When you wake a few seconds later you will not remember doing this for a couple of seconds and then you will be like 'oh yeah thats what i was doing' and your face and tounge will tingle 4 a minute but a few minutes later you might suddenly be thinking about something and say 'what...' for no reason cuz thats wat happened to me and trust me this doesnt give you brain damage or anything, a bit of a headache if you do it lots but no brain damage cuz i did it heaps in the computer lab at school and my friend was in one spot one second and the other the next and i thought 'kool!' and he didnt even know what i did its cool to just black out sometimes. And at school i was just sitting in a chair to do this so you can do that too.
cameron <vicekilla_noobzz a hotmailcom>
sumwer, qld aus - Tuesday, March 30, 2010 at 01:22:39 (PDT)
Ok so when I was young and didn't KNOW that I needed glasses. I would be sitting in class and NOT be able to read the chalkboard. A trick I figured out to overcome this is to create a reallllllly small hole (pinhole) through by rolling up your index finger and looking through that. So small that you can just barely see through it, and VOILA! You dont need to wear glasses anymore!
Deepak <suitesite a hotmailcom>
USA - Friday, March 26, 2010 at 10:51:41 (PDT)
I know I just posted, but I remembered another:

Place your arms at your sides, and then bend your wrists so that your palms are parallel to the ground. Now move one shoulder up and the other down at once, and reverse. You should feel tendons moving in your middle fingers.

Ratci
USA - Friday, March 19, 2010 at 02:44:01 (PDT)
If you have glasses, place yourself so that the sun is shining on your face. Try to look directly at your lenses rather than what lies beyond them. You should see the reflection of your own eye. This is especially cool if you have been crying or sweating because it gets all glimmery and pretty (or if you are a girl and wearing eye-makeup).

Also, when you look up at the stars at night, try not to see them as points, but as they actually are, burning balls of gas millions of miles away. It might not be much, but this one always trips me out.

Third, just imagine that absolutely nothing existed. Try to wrap your mind around absolutely nothing. This one always gives me a weird feeling. ^_^

Ratci
USA - Friday, March 19, 2010 at 02:18:55 (PDT)
Cross your middle finger over your index finger. Now, take a finger from your other hand (index is easiest) and rub it back and forth in the space between the tips of your two crossed fingers. It feels like there's more than one finger. (The effect is increased if you're not looking at what you're doing.) This is just something that really fascinated me as a kid...
Molly <risika6 a msn.com>
Sarasota, FL USA - Saturday, March 13, 2010 at 23:35:59 (PST)
Fill a sink up with water(or your bath). Now take a cup and put it under water, turn it so water gets into it, no pull the cupp out slowly so the open part of the cup is still in the water, the cup will be full of water, yet it will be up-side-down.
Cameron
Whitby, Ontario Canada - Friday, February 19, 2010 at 18:18:59 (PST)
I was really bored while reading this and testing some of these out, especially the laser pointer ones.

I pressed the laser to the edge of my eye--where the eyelid is starting to open up, or as far as you can get without touching your skull--and i saw the red light on the opposite edge.

Works with open or closed eyes.

Oreopizza47
USA - Wednesday, February 03, 2010 at 18:49:14 (PST)
This works well with your quick witted friends:

While walking into a public restroom with a clever friend, begin a fake conversation about a friend with a horrible injury and carry on the conversation until you are finished peeing and leave. Example: "Did you see Larry?!" "Awww... yeah man, that fork went right through his foot!" "He bled all over the waitress!" "Gross!" etc...

-or-

If you are with a shy friend, spring the same conversation on him or her. Make sure you are loud and obnoxious. Choose a new topic every time; your mutant dog, your girlfriend's love affair with a goat, anything messed up.

Chris Ivins
USA - Sunday, January 17, 2010 at 11:04:14 (PST)
Believe it or not, I possess the great skill of mind control.
YOU ARE NOW MANUALLY BREATHING



YOU ARE NOW THINKING IN THE VOICE OF SEAN CONNERY

really bored mad scientist
USA - Thursday, January 14, 2010 at 00:46:41 (PST)
 



LOTS MORE of this sort of thing.


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